Table of Contents
Feeling overwhelmed by parents shouting and friends bragging about themselves? Humans are social creatures as it is and during exam times when we are literally about to be objectively compared against our peers can put you under a lot of stress and anxiety. You can use these quick scientifically proven tips to beat peer pressure right now.
Hey everyone! it’s exam time and you’re stressed, you can’t eat well, you don’t’ get to sleep well and when you wake up in the morning you feel so tired, you get annoyed with your mom and you know right now when you touch your palm they’re sweaty so let me tell you a story.
A common story with an “Uncommon” message
Recently, I went to my friend’s birthday party and the host was conducting these very unusual games. In one strange game, there was a stash of stuffed toys lying in the center of the hall and each one of us was asked to pick up one toy that represented us and reflected our personality and the one which looked like me was a little chimp. So everyone was quite excited about picking up their toys, some people were complaining that “Hey you know the toy that I wanted is already got picked up !” and some people were finding it amusing. As we all sat down back on our seats, I found myself getting anxious by watching everyone else’s toy that looked so attractive and colourful and soft and fluffy and I got that little chimp, anyways, soon everyone was given a glass. The same glass was in front of every single person and we were asked to stuff our toy into that glass. Literally, it was so difficult and some of the people that had chosen the really small toys had it easily fit into the glass and we’re looking around smiling at everyone and those that had chosen the big teddy bears were screaming “It’s not fair! Why does it always happen to me?” and stress started building up.
The reason this story is important while we’re talking about how to overcome exam stress is that this toy is like us, differently shaped and unique. The glass is like that Engineering or Medical entrance exam or the Science exam, the exact same for everyone. Now a famous quotation by Einstein says that “Everybody is a genius but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb trees then it will live its entire life thinking that is stupid”.
Ask the RIGHT Questions
Stress is caused by unrealistic and very high expectations now let’s change the WHY in our question to WHAT, instead of saying:
“Why does this always happen to me?”
“Why does it always end up like this?”
“Why is life so unfair?”
How about we ask the questions differently like:
“What should be the solution to this problem?”
“What do I require to fit my toy into that glass?”
“What do I need to do right now to overcome exam stress?”
Some Practical Solutions
I will give you three solutions and one bonus tip that I have learned from monks like Gaur Gopal Das ji and Shri Dandapani and the teachings of Lord Buddha.
Choosing the right container:
Are we just mindlessly following the herd? Let’s be honest. Do we have that faith in ourselves and the courage to follow our passion? Are we really in charge or is someone else driving our car of life? See, life is a paradox, stress is often caused when we try to control life and its outcomes, and also the lack of control over ourselves is one of the biggest causes of stress. The things that can be controlled are our preparation attitude during the journey, time management, priorities, efforts, and expectations. These are our goals but what is not under our control is our rank, our exam score, those trophies, medals, and the admission. These are our dreams, not the goals so we need to just focus on our goals and leave the dreams for the universe to fulfill.
Focus on building the right skills:
I know how you feel trapped like time is ticking, there’s no room for failing, I’m already being weighed down by the pressures of my past mistakes, what do I do? Just remember that a single piece of paper does not decide your future. The skills that you keep learning and your knowledge are going to be your key strengths and game-changers in pushing you forward. Now, many times we already know for instance that Science subject is our weak point or that we need to practice those Maths questions every day and it’s obvious that people make many resolutions each year to say I’m going to improve my Communication skills per instance but we feel so stressed and demoralized that instead we just keep watching one Instagram-reel after another. The monks strongly believe that everything that happens to us happens for a reason and we shouldn’t regret thinking of our past, in fact, we should use our past as the most powerful teacher, So just burn up your excuses, take full responsibility for your progress in your own hand and see the miracles unfold in your life. Instill a passion for learning to make your toys so agile and flexible that they perfectly fit into the glass of your choice.
Expand your container:
What if your glass could become a big bowl and your toy could comfortably fit inside it. In the monk’s language, expanding your container means these five things: First, Count your blessings – Write a gratitude diary. Second, Just remind yourself of how talented and fantastic you are and think of all the good things. Third, expand your circle of friends to include Motivating and inspiring people who trust you. Keep some emotional distance from people that presence makes you feel uncomfortable and sharing with your friends helps you calm down. Fourth, Enlarge your purpose by helping those that are suffering, and that way you focus less on your own pain. Fifth, Enlarge your consciousness and make a spiritual connection to get the strength to be able to deal with the pain.
Bonus Tip
Now, for the bonus tip, the tip is to focus on one thing at a time. Our mind is this monkey that jumps from the present to the future and the past in random order and when you’re studying one moment, the next moment you’re thinking “Oh my god! I’m definitely gonna fail in my exams” and the very next moment you’re wondering you start thinking about other things. Focus on the present moment. Be mindful and focus on what you can control and if your awareness wanders here or there then stop and take a break to bring your awareness back to the present moment and keep going.
Needless to say, you have to look after yourself and try to get at least 6-7 hours of sleep, take Vitamin-C supplements, try to get about 10-15 minutes of sunlight every day, do some light stretching exercises, sing in the shower if you like to and keep smiling. Developing a routine ritual of mindfulness reflecting on your own thoughts and meditation will go a long way in creating a happier you.
Also read: Some Study Room Ideas to Get the Best Out of Online Classes
Frequently Asked Questions
Sometimes my friends brag a lot about their marks or other achievements which makes me uncomfortable, is something wrong with me?
Absolutely not, it's a human tendency to compare but comparing with others will lead us nowhere, and that's why our biggest competitor is ourselves. We should compare our current progress with the last day and by being 1% better each day we will become relentless.
My parents sometimes say things that make me feel uncomfortable. Should I leave my house?
See parents are our only real well-wishers in the entire world, everyone else has their own motives, and running from the problem will not get you anywhere, you will have to face it to win in the game of life, so go through the article to fix your inner self and make your parents believe in you by your actions.
